5 ways to reduce perfectionism
How to Reduce Perfectionism
After helping countless clients cope with and reduce perfectionism, I’m walking you through 5 ways to reduce perfectionism in order to allow you to feel less anxious and overwhelmed.
5 ways to reduce perfectionism and embrace progress
Perfectionism can feel like both a strength and a burden. While striving for excellence is valuable, the pursuit of perfection often leads to stress, procrastination, and self-doubt. It’s important to balance high standards with self-compassion and flexibility. Here are five ways to reduce perfectionism and embrace a healthier approach.
1. Redefine Success
Perfectionists often equate success with being flawless. However, real success is more nuanced. Redefine it as progress, learning, and growth rather than meeting an impossible standard. By shifting your perspective, you can celebrate milestones and small achievements, which build momentum and foster resilience.
How to do it:
• Set realistic, specific goals that allow room for adjustment.
• Reward yourself for efforts, not just outcomes.
• Accept that mistakes and failures are essential parts of learning.
2. Practice Self-Compassion
One of the roots of perfectionism is the fear of being inadequate or unworthy. By practicing self-compassion, you can begin to dismantle the harsh judgments you place on yourself. It involves treating yourself with kindness and understanding, especially when you experience setbacks.
How to do it:
• Speak to yourself with the same empathy you would offer a friend.
• Remind yourself that it’s okay to struggle and that you’re human.
• Engage in mindfulness practices, like meditation, to build awareness of your thoughts and reduce the tendency to self-criticize.
3. Challenge Negative Self-Talk
Perfectionism often comes with an inner critic, constantly pushing you to do better while berating you for not being “good enough.” Challenging negative self-talk is essential in combating perfectionism. Instead of focusing on where you fall short, acknowledge your efforts and accomplishments.
How to do it:
• When a critical thought arises, ask yourself if you’d say the same thing to a friend in your position.
• Replace “I should have” with “I did my best given the circumstances.”
• Keep a journal of your daily achievements to shift your mindset toward positivity.
4. Set Boundaries Around Your Time
Perfectionists often spend excessive amounts of time on tasks, believing that more effort will guarantee a better result. However, this can lead to burnout and diminishing returns. Setting time limits for your work can help you focus on what’s important and let go of over-polishing.
How to do it:
• Use time-blocking to allocate specific periods for work and rest.
• Limit how long you allow yourself to tweak or revise a task before calling it complete.
• Prioritize tasks by impact, so you spend more time on what truly matters.
5. Embrace Imperfection
It’s easy to get trapped in a cycle of waiting until things are perfect before sharing ideas, launching projects, or pursuing personal goals. However, growth and improvement only happen when you take action. Embracing imperfection allows you to move forward and learn as you go, instead of staying stuck in a loop of endless revisions.
How to do it:
• Adopt a “good enough” mindset for everyday tasks.
• Aim for completion rather than perfection, especially when starting something new.
• Share your work even if it feels unfinished, and welcome feedback as part of the process.
Do I need help with my perfectionism?
Reducing perfectionism doesn’t mean lowering your standards or abandoning your ambitions. It’s about finding a balance between striving for excellence and maintaining your mental and emotional well-being. Often, it’s helpful to work on perfectionism in therapy by getting to the root cause of why you feel the need to be perfect. Reach out to me to learn more about reducing perfectionism.
About the author, Allison Barton, LMFT
I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of California. I specialize in Anxiety, Perfectionism, and Trauma. I primarily utilize Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) when working with clients. I am also trained in Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), mindfulness skills, solution focused therapy, and family systems.
